Greatest hits

I put this up on Facebook earlier in the week (everyone was putting up a list of 25 bits of personal trivia, and I always go along with the crowd), but didn't want anyone to miss out on learning more about me. For those of you who have already read this list, I've spruced it up with some cool links and a brand new entry at #25. Next time I have nothing to write about, I'll probably regret not saving some of these items and turning them into their own posts, but oh well.

1. When I was a kid, I shared a room with my older brother, and after lunch on Saturdays we had to take naps. To get out of this, on more than one occasion we would "wet my bed"--stand up next to my bed and use the mattress as a toilet. For some reason my mom never questioned why my sheets were wet but not my pants, but I figure now that she must have known. (Nothing like starting off a list like this with a bang, eh?)

2. That time when I was little and I claimed I said "Dan" to my brother and sister? I lied. I really swore. And I swore a couple more times in my youth because I thought it was cool. But now I really dislike cursing. I’m more likely to be put off by bad language in a movie or TV show than by violent or sexual content. Unless the swearing is done by Will Smith.

3. Once I stole a pack’s worth of baseball cards from my Primary teacher’s house while at a party there. My rationale: the cards were loose in the toy box, and their oldest child was just 3 years old at the time--too young, I supposed, to appreciate the cards. I still have them. (I promise this note will be more than a list of my childhood indiscretions.)

4. I’m a genius. I won an award from the Rocky Mountain Talent Search in the 7th grade for highest ACT score in the state for my age level (I got a 26). When I took the test for real in high school, I scored a 34.

5. I've never been shy about letting people know how smart I am, either. In elementary school, if I was the first to finish a test, I would "discretely" rustle my paper as I walked to the teacher’s desk to turn it in. I ceased this practice when I was called on it by Brad Price, a smart and highly-competitive classmate.

6. I used to be a really picky eater. I ate peanut butter sandwiches (no jelly), cereal, and that was about it. Now I will gladly try anything, and there are very few foods I don’t like (not much of a surprise when you look at my belly).

7. Some discontinued foods that I really miss: PB Max, Toll House Cookie Bars, the Sonic pancake on a stick, O'Boises (they’re O’Boisterous!), Crystal Pepsi, the German chocolate brownie at Mrs. Fields, and various novelty cereals (Smurf Berry Crunch, Nintendo, Mr. T (I'm not the only one who liked it), Ghostbusters, Batman, etc.).

8. I've always been attracted to redheads. Certainly not exclusively, but I’m definitely on the “pro” side of this sometimes-polarizing debate.

9. If I’m watching TV alone, I usually do it standing up. Especially if I’m watching sports.

10. When I worked as a phone-screener on Marie Osmond’s radio show, I had to try to mislead every caller into thinking we were on the air live. It was weird.

11. Speaking of deception...my house was one of many in which children were banned from watching The Simpsons. I watched it anyway, when I could get away with it. Tired of having to turn it off whenever I heard someone coming, I eventually challenged my mom to watch an episode with me and see if it was as bad as she thought it was. She agreed, we watched the episode where Marge starts a pretzel business, and Mom determined the show was unobjectionable (though not entertaining to her). I began taping the episodes in case she changed her mind later on. Although it’s not nearly as good as it used to be, The Simpsons is definitely my all-time favorite show. Which, considering how much TV I watch, is really saying something.

12. I vividly remember the time my dad lost his temper at FHE because it was so out of character for him. He’s great.

13. One of my favorite things about living in New York is not having to drive. I've never enjoyed driving. I am a good driver though (but poor at parking).

14. The two things I do on a semi-regular basis that make me most nervous are ask girls on dates and give Priesthood blessings.

15. I’m still surprised that my idea of a "Start the Fast" activity didn't become more popular than "Break the Fast" in my student ward.

16. I now regret any time in the past where I described people or things as "gay," "retarded," and similarly inappropriate words.

17. My favorite sport to play is wallyball (volleyball on a racquetball court) because I can actually perform pretty well, since there’s hardly any running involved, and my inability to hit the ball straight is actually an asset. Plus, BYU Intramural rules negate some of the potential advantages held by people who can jump. It’s right up my alley.

18. If I have an open package of cookies or cheese, no matter how much is left, I’m at least as likely to finish the package as I am to eat some and put the rest away.

19. It’s been WAY too long since I kissed anybody.

20. I've had many nicknames in my life. First it was "Peepo," because of the way I said "people" when I was little (and not because of this). My friend Wade called me "Jeffrey Huggins" after the Beverly Cleary character Henry Huggins. Future NBA player Britton Johnsen christened me Lurch in junior high, because back then I was tall and skinny and never smiled. In high school everyone called me Hoover, but not because I sucked (although the origin does—my middle name is Edward, or Mr. Ed, who was a horse, and horses have hooves...seriously, that’s it...). In college, my coworker Natalie labeled our studio crew "the Fat Kids," because all the other BYU Broadcasting employees looked down on us "like the fat kid who gets picked last for softball."

21. I watched more R-rated movies in one of my mission areas (although they weren't rated R there, since the UK uses a different system, and this total includes watching "The Green Mile" at the bishop’s house on Christmas day) than I have in the rest of my life combined.

22. My brother and I engaged in some epic games of jungle ball in our bedroom. We had a big, round laundry detergent container that we used as a basket, and one of those rubber balls you get for two bucks from ShopKo. The only rule was you had to dribble. We’d play for over an hour and the final score would be something like 6-4. The rest of the time, we were grappling on the floor. My brother was bigger, stronger, and more aggressive than me, but if I could get around behind him I’d dig my chin into his back. Plus, there was the time my brother sheared off our doorknob trying to pull himself up, and another time I knocked him back and he put his butt through the drywall. I count those as victories.

23. I’m already on the lookout for ideas for this year’s Halloween costume. For some reason, I think it would be hilarious if I dressed as Kim Jong-il.

24. I really like music videos. The cheesier the better. Many of my favorite songs rate high on my list mainly because I like the video for the song.

25. A middle-aged lady I tried to help reactivate in one of my mission areas told me I have "come-to-bed eyes." I'm pretty sure she meant it as a compliment.

I'll stop there, but rest assured I could easily come up with seven or eight more. I'm a pretty interesting fellow.