'90s Region

Yeah, yeah, the basketball tournament is over. But I'm going to keep going with mine anyway. On to the '90s Region!

1ST ROUND

1) Friends vs. 32) Herman's Head
Determining who should get the top spot in this region was probably the toughest choice of the seeding process. I ultimately decided that Friends has probably aged better than Seinfeld, meaning that if someone today watched both shows for the first time, they would relate more to Ross and Rachel than to Jerry and Elaine. Jane Sibbett was in both of these shows, but she played a lesbian in the one that wasn't on FOX. That's weird. I liked Herman, but I'm glad it didn't last too long, or it may have impacted the success of The Simpsons.

16) The Larry Sanders Show vs. 17) Blossom
I've never watched Sanders, but I've heard good things and would like to check it out some day. I never really watched Blossom either, but it gets the nod on the strength of a classic SNL skit where car keys were mistaken for condoms and nothing was as it seems. Whoa! Unfortunately, I can't find video of it anywhere.

9) Saved By the Bell vs. 24) NewsRadio
So sad that one of these shows has to go out in the first round. Phil Hartman is one of the most underrated comedians ever. I miss him much more than Chris Farley. Such a good ensemble cast on that show that one can even tolerate the presence of Joe Rogan and Andy Dick.

8) Murphy Brown vs. 25) Ned & Stacey
Candice Bergen gets kudos for adding Pee-Wee Herman and wrong-bathroom-user Garry Marshall to the cast late in her show's run, but it's not enough to beat my favorite underrated '90s sitcom.

5) Home Improvement vs. 28) Just Shoot Me
You don't need "more power" to beat David Spade. He's pretty scrawny.

12) Mad About You vs. 21) The Drew Carey Show
So frustrating that one of these shows advances while NewsRadio gets sent packing. I should have done a better job rigging the seedings. I am not exaggerating when I say that the first four times I stumbled upon Mad while channel surfing, it was the same unfunny part of the same unfunny episode, one where Helen Hunt had kissed another guy and is trying to get Paul Reiser to forgive her. That's a great sitcom.

13) Boy Meets World vs. 20) Family Matters
Spinning off from Perfect Strangers can only get you so far. But one character from the show may win in a separate bracket.

4) Roseanne vs. 29) Spin City
Sara Gilbert's presence in the aforementioned Blossom sketch gives Roseanne the edge in this matchup of two more shows I never saw much of.

3) Everybody Loves Raymond vs. 30) Step By Step
Step By Step taught me the joys of mixing milk and chocolate syrup in my mouth, but it's just such a blatant ripoff of The Brady Bunch.

14) That '70s Show vs. 19) Wings
Remember when everyone thought the entire '70s cast were going to become big stars? How's that working out? Anyone seen Wilmer lately?

11) Will & Grace vs. 22) Ellen
I promise I didn't set up this showdown on purpose. I think Ellen is the funniest woman since Lucille Ball, but that's more in relation to her stand-up and her talk show, and not so much her sitcom or her acting.

6) Frasier vs. 27) Arli$$
Oh, why can't someone make a good sports sitcom?

7) Sex and the City vs. 26) Northern Exposure
The ultimate small town-big city matchup. I choose the show with Kristin Davis, regardless of where she lives.

10) The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air vs. 23) Sabrina the Teenage Witch
Will Smith to Melissa Joan Hart: "yo homes, smell ya later!"

15) 3rd Rock From the Sun vs. 18) The Nanny
3rd Rock can easily be confused with 30 Rock, which is a better show. Fran Drescher's laugh can easily be confused with a weedwacker, which is a more pleasant sound.

2) Seinfeld vs. 31) Dharma & Greg
What's the deal with hippies marrying yuppies? I don't get it!

2ND ROUND

1) Friends vs. 17) Blossom
I didn't like Friends much at the end, but the first few seasons were pretty funny, actually.

25) Ned & Stacey vs. 9) Saved By The Bell
Thomas Haden Church and Debra Messing at their finest still can't top The Max's best customers.

5) Home Improvement vs. 21) The Drew Carey Show
Drew Carey has ruined at least two shows that were great with different hosts. He's just not funny. Even so, I assumed he was at least capable of feigning excitement. I was wrong.

4) Roseanne vs. 13) Boy Meets World
BMW's balanced attack (likeable male leads, an amazing girlfriend, a cool teacher, a neighbor/principal with a legendary voice) is too much for Roseanne's superstar-heavy (I mean heavy superstar) lineup.

3) Everybody Loves Raymond vs. 19) Wings
Sweet sassy molassey! Raymond is on a roll.

6) Frasier vs. 11) Will & Grace
The W&G guys are more masculine than Frasier and Niles, I think. Sean Hayes hosted one of SNL's best-ever episodes, and as we've already seen, that actually matters in this tournament.

7) Sex and the City vs. 10) The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
As a teenager, I once saw Tom Jones at the airport in SLC. I only recognized him because of his connection with Carlton Banks. I'd also like to point out that, if some adjustments were made to the length of the court and height of the basket, Will Smith could dominate in real March Madness.

2) Seinfeld vs. 15) 3rd Rock From the Sun
Wayne Knight's only relevant comedy roles go head to head! Unless you count Space Jam. And nobody counts Space Jam.

3RD ROUND

1) Friends vs. 9) Saved By The Bell
The six on six is pretty much a wash, but the coaching edge (Belding vs. Gunther) clearly goes to Bayside.

13) Boy Meets World vs. 5) Home Improvement
Most sitcoms get worse when the kids grow up and become un-cute. This happened to Home Improvement, but Boy Meets World avoided the curse. Cory, Shawn and Topanga remained appealing into young adulthood, and that helped it become a classic show instead of a good one.

3) Everybody Loves Raymond vs. 11) Will & Grace
W&G is advancing much farther than I thought it would. But Raymond is a very overrated show, I think.

2) Seinfeld vs. 10) The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
In the '90s, The Simpsons was banned in my house, but we all watched Fresh Prince together in spite of its swearing, sexual innuendo, and introduction of Tyra Banks into mainstream culture. Kind of strange.

REGIONAL SEMIFINAL

9) Saved By The Bell vs. 13) Boy Meets World
They keep winning! I'm so excited! I'm so excited! I'm so...scared!

2) Seinfeld vs. 11) Will & Grace
It's hard to keep a Cinderella run going when your team is full of Prince Charmings. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

REGIONAL FINAL

9) Saved By The Bell vs. 2) Seinfeld
Let it be known that I am firmly on the "pro" side when it comes to the Seinfeld finale. I thought it was a perfect way to end the series.

NIT bound: Veronica's Closet, Two Guys and a Girl (with or without the pizza place), The Single Guy, Suddenly Susan, Living Single, Caroline in the City, The Critic, Dinosaurs, Evening Shade, Get a Life, Boston Common, Hanigin' with Mr. Cooper, Roc

Not even if the tourney expanded to 1,012: Vinnie & Bobby (and you thought Joey was Matt LeBlanc's first terrible show), Shasta McNasty, Hang Time (this team and the High School Musical guys should play each other, no?), and of course, Homeboys in Outer Space